Killer training today,coupled with the exhaustion from the entire week...it just screams,"SHAG!" 8X1.2km,made to get up so early for a supposed "earlier" training at 7.30...in the end we still started at 8. Bleah! Anyway many thanks to Sarah for her screams of encouragement(even when she was already tiring herself and her stomach was killing her) during the second-last lap,and also to Siew Min for her mental support despite her leg injury. Get well soon gals,all the way to Nationals! :)
Believe in the truth,
and it shall set you free.
But where is this truth to believe in?
That only you may see.
Believe in the beating blood,
the refrain of a broken soul.
Believe in the effortless dance,
believe and be made whole.
Believe in what must be,
believe in what cannot.
And know that whatever they say,
it is yours to believe...or not.
Believe in justice,
and it shall be.
Believe in truth,
and be set free.
Believe and yet have doubts,
and you shall find a way-
for the truth,
whatever it may be,
is found in all you say.
Believe in love,
and you believe in loss-
believe in power,
and you have lost control.
Believe in yourself,
and all is as it seems-
for everything is visible,
to the eyes of your dreams.
Friday, June 15, 2007
Thursday, June 14, 2007
What the...
Is it just me,or is my mum the hardest person to get along with? Why is it always so difficult to talk to her,even just to be around her?? Why do I always feel so uncomfortable and restricted whenever she is around? I always feel like walking away,just to avoid her...ughx...sounds mean,I know,but I can't help it! It's just such an involuntary reaction *sighs*
Phone call from my brother who just came back from his holiday in A'Famosa(which she would normally jump up to answer),but unfortunately she was stuck in the toilet. So I answered,and called for her. All she yelled back was that she was in the toilet,so naturally I presumed she would be done soon,and told my bro to keep on the line since she would be out soon...or so I thought. Five minutes,still not out,and my brother started to worry(because it's per minute billing for his phone charges) yet I told him to stay awhile more. Called for her and was again answered with,"Wait lah! In toilet lah!" Fine. Talked to him abit,asked about the holiday,what he did,what he ate etc...Five minutes stretched to ten...and she's not out yet! My brother started getting anxious and I called again,this time,she screamed back,"Bathing lah!" And that was when I realised she was not coming out anytime soon...and my bro had to pay for ten minutes worth of crap time! WTH! if she had told me earlier that she was showering,I would have told him to put down long ago! Of course I got scolded later,just for "screaming" when she was showering.*rolls her eyes*
I’m sick of routine,
sick of the lies,
sick of always hiding the tears
I want to cry.
Silently wishing that life
will suddenly end.
The pain is overwhelming
and I can no longer pretend,
that I’m really happy.
I can’t hold onto that fake smile,
can’t take being thrown around,
it seems like my heart is so fragile.
I feel myself slipping,
being sucked into the whirl-pool of lies,
being trapped in this world,
where I want to die.
I feel like I’m unable to face the truth...
Do you know what its like
to walk by a crowd,
knowing they all hate you?
I’m fighting a battle I just can’t win,
I feel like all I am,
isn’t worth a thing.
I feel the light slowly fading,
as the sun sets in the sky.
But I’m living this life,
where happiness is a lie.
I’m sick of hating all that life is,
I’m sick of this.
Phone call from my brother who just came back from his holiday in A'Famosa(which she would normally jump up to answer),but unfortunately she was stuck in the toilet. So I answered,and called for her. All she yelled back was that she was in the toilet,so naturally I presumed she would be done soon,and told my bro to keep on the line since she would be out soon...or so I thought. Five minutes,still not out,and my brother started to worry(because it's per minute billing for his phone charges) yet I told him to stay awhile more. Called for her and was again answered with,"Wait lah! In toilet lah!" Fine. Talked to him abit,asked about the holiday,what he did,what he ate etc...Five minutes stretched to ten...and she's not out yet! My brother started getting anxious and I called again,this time,she screamed back,"Bathing lah!" And that was when I realised she was not coming out anytime soon...and my bro had to pay for ten minutes worth of crap time! WTH! if she had told me earlier that she was showering,I would have told him to put down long ago! Of course I got scolded later,just for "screaming" when she was showering.*rolls her eyes*
I’m sick of routine,
sick of the lies,
sick of always hiding the tears
I want to cry.
Silently wishing that life
will suddenly end.
The pain is overwhelming
and I can no longer pretend,
that I’m really happy.
I can’t hold onto that fake smile,
can’t take being thrown around,
it seems like my heart is so fragile.
I feel myself slipping,
being sucked into the whirl-pool of lies,
being trapped in this world,
where I want to die.
I feel like I’m unable to face the truth...
Do you know what its like
to walk by a crowd,
knowing they all hate you?
I’m fighting a battle I just can’t win,
I feel like all I am,
isn’t worth a thing.
I feel the light slowly fading,
as the sun sets in the sky.
But I’m living this life,
where happiness is a lie.
I’m sick of hating all that life is,
I’m sick of this.
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
What a blast!
Alright I was wrong,track chalet was a balst! It was so so fun,and the trackers quickly assimiliated us crossers into their large family with all the ice-breaking and bonding games we played on Monday. It was a great day,the only stupid thing was that I was too over-dressed for the occasion. Ugh,I turned up in jeans,and we had to play beach captain ball and Whacko on the sand! can you imagine sweating and running in jeans? Man...*grimaces* the Whacko was with increasing difficulty due to the drilling sounds generated from the construction site near us which made it tough for us to discern whether it was our names being yelled,and the number of people whacking kept increasing-from one to eventually,four! Four people walking around in the circle ready to whack any unsuspecting,unalert bloke...it made the whole game so scary and pretty soon we were all screaming and scrambling and yelling! *laughs* In the end,I was one of the three whackers left in the circle and we had to do forfeits suggested by the group(yes,it was supposed to be four whackers,but for some reason,poor Shannon ended up with two sticks...*big laugh*) So the other guy(sorry,I forgot his name!) had to roll on the sand until he enters the sea *winces*,Shannon had to do a gay dance around the circle with sick pelvic thrusts at every girl(ewww...hahax) and poor me had to do the most conventional...pole dance. And because Shannon had two sticks,he had to do a double forfeit,which ended up in him being my pole! What a scene! :D
Then it was wash-up(the guys took sooo much longer than the girls,surprisingly) and while waiting,we played those group games like Killer Move and another having to do with milk...sounds weird and really confusing initially but after you get the hang of it...man it was soooo funny! Especially seeing the people losing the momentum and they start blabbering any weird sound that comes across their already confused minds...HAHA!
Dinner was at Changi Village with the reputedly best Nasi Lemak stall,but of course the queue was so long none of us wanted to wait,and ended up eating Hokkien Mee(with a layer of lard underneath),Hor Fun,Claypot noodles etc...Other than eating,we also kept a close lookout for the infamous people who regularly throng the Changi village area-the transsexuals. Although it was a little early,we were lucky...we saw one in red,but it was her(his?) back-view,argh! This is probably the closest I have been to one,not that I'm disgusted nor am I discriminating against them,but I kinda find it an eye-opener.
Back to the chalet after dinner,and the mood was all set for the night walk to (you guessed it) Changi Hospital,which was (as usual) said to be haunted. Ghost stories were told, the guys went around "boo-ing" the girls, people thought up many "What-if"s situations,like "What if you heard your name being called behind you and you are the last?" Now when you read this you may go,"Aiyah,scared of what?" but believe me,when you are there and soaking in the darkness of the gloomy surroundings (our chalet was just right beside the hospital,mind you),hearing such stuff can really make you feel the goosebumps! There was also a general panic when there weren't enough torches for the 6 groups,but in the end we ,managed to share and the guys got to show their macho sides by volunteering to lend the girls their torches(thanks guys!).
6 groups,each with 6 people,except Clarence's group,which had only 5. Then there was again a general panic where people heard many warnings before and that it was better to stick to them just in case something really happened...
1)Don't walk in odd numbers,or someone may go missing...or you may end up with an extra *shudders*
2)Don't turn just your head aornd,make sure you turn fully,body and all.
3)Don't call one another by their names just in case those "things" decide to follow
4)Don't look between your legs (who would do that?!)
5)Stay close and don't wander off even if you heard your name being called
6)Don't wear red
Poor Clarence didn't know about the last warning,and we only realised that when we were about the start up the route in our individual groups. In the end he took off his shirt and went for the walk half-naked!
The start was really freaky,as in it was dark and there was silence like,EVERYWHERE. Even worse,my group was the last to walk the route,the so-called "sweeping group", and by then the atmosphere was already very solemn. Shaun,Cheryl,Megan,Nic Teng,Desmond and me,one girl to one guy,slowly making the last march up the route... Thank goodness Shaun and Desmond had the coolness to tell us stories of themselves in VS and how fun it was...it really lightened the mood. When we finally reached the meeting place,it wasn't that bad anymore *sighs*. Then it was a group briefing(in the dark,within the compounds of the hospital!) which was really motivating...thanks James and Shaun!
By the time we reached the chalet it was like 12.30,but there were still some of us who wanted to go explore more,as in ALL the different wings of the hospital,and also to find the mortuary,which was somewhere near the hospital. I was game,and the second time was a group of 8: Kenji,Louis,Jo,Amelia,Chao Yang,two other guys and me. This walk was much much longer and of course,much more creepy than the first. Thanks to Amelia for holding my hand throughout(hey,I know sound very "hum-chi",but I was really freaked lah...) and to Chao Yang and the other guy for always walking behind us to ensure we won't end up being at the back! Kenji and Louis both saw something at this building,at the same time at the same place,and thank goodness curiosity didn't get the better of us that night!
We got to the mortuary after much searching,but unfortunately(or fortunately?) it was completely sealed,as in,the doorways and everything were not just locked,they were sealed with cement! There must be a reason why...*shudders* We tried to peep in through the broken windows,but there was nothing much inside,just white-washed walls that looked pretty new,hmmm...We also went into this operating theatre(judging from the designs of the ceiling lights) and right in this last adjoining room,there was this lone chair in the middle,smashed and broken. Yeah,just a damaged chair by itself in the middle of this large empty room. That was when we decided to turn back,all wondering what could have happened before...
Jo was really brave,as in she was so solid! There was this idiot group of other thrill-seeking youths who were behind us in the walk,and then they just screamed and ran away,hoping to scare us. I mean,they were all guys and in their early 20s! It was so stupid to see them doing something sooo pathetic,and Jo was like,"CMI lah please!" HAHA,you rock girl!
We went back at 2.15 and Megan,Siew Min and I then shared a cab(ignoring the extra surcharge and the hole it burnt in our pockets)-we were that exhuasted. We went back on the second night for the main event-the barbecue-which was also really fun,and there was more mingling with the almost-always absent throwers,finally. More games played,more bonding,more eating...and finally it was time to go home!
Exhausting but one of the best chalets I have ever attended! *smiles* Big thanks to James the organiser,Hua Jia,Yao Peng,Shaun and the entire Track and Field team. You guys rock!
Then it was wash-up(the guys took sooo much longer than the girls,surprisingly) and while waiting,we played those group games like Killer Move and another having to do with milk...sounds weird and really confusing initially but after you get the hang of it...man it was soooo funny! Especially seeing the people losing the momentum and they start blabbering any weird sound that comes across their already confused minds...HAHA!
Dinner was at Changi Village with the reputedly best Nasi Lemak stall,but of course the queue was so long none of us wanted to wait,and ended up eating Hokkien Mee(with a layer of lard underneath),Hor Fun,Claypot noodles etc...Other than eating,we also kept a close lookout for the infamous people who regularly throng the Changi village area-the transsexuals. Although it was a little early,we were lucky...we saw one in red,but it was her(his?) back-view,argh! This is probably the closest I have been to one,not that I'm disgusted nor am I discriminating against them,but I kinda find it an eye-opener.
Back to the chalet after dinner,and the mood was all set for the night walk to (you guessed it) Changi Hospital,which was (as usual) said to be haunted. Ghost stories were told, the guys went around "boo-ing" the girls, people thought up many "What-if"s situations,like "What if you heard your name being called behind you and you are the last?" Now when you read this you may go,"Aiyah,scared of what?" but believe me,when you are there and soaking in the darkness of the gloomy surroundings (our chalet was just right beside the hospital,mind you),hearing such stuff can really make you feel the goosebumps! There was also a general panic when there weren't enough torches for the 6 groups,but in the end we ,managed to share and the guys got to show their macho sides by volunteering to lend the girls their torches(thanks guys!).
6 groups,each with 6 people,except Clarence's group,which had only 5. Then there was again a general panic where people heard many warnings before and that it was better to stick to them just in case something really happened...
1)Don't walk in odd numbers,or someone may go missing...or you may end up with an extra *shudders*
2)Don't turn just your head aornd,make sure you turn fully,body and all.
3)Don't call one another by their names just in case those "things" decide to follow
4)Don't look between your legs (who would do that?!)
5)Stay close and don't wander off even if you heard your name being called
6)Don't wear red
Poor Clarence didn't know about the last warning,and we only realised that when we were about the start up the route in our individual groups. In the end he took off his shirt and went for the walk half-naked!
The start was really freaky,as in it was dark and there was silence like,EVERYWHERE. Even worse,my group was the last to walk the route,the so-called "sweeping group", and by then the atmosphere was already very solemn. Shaun,Cheryl,Megan,Nic Teng,Desmond and me,one girl to one guy,slowly making the last march up the route... Thank goodness Shaun and Desmond had the coolness to tell us stories of themselves in VS and how fun it was...it really lightened the mood. When we finally reached the meeting place,it wasn't that bad anymore *sighs*. Then it was a group briefing(in the dark,within the compounds of the hospital!) which was really motivating...thanks James and Shaun!
By the time we reached the chalet it was like 12.30,but there were still some of us who wanted to go explore more,as in ALL the different wings of the hospital,and also to find the mortuary,which was somewhere near the hospital. I was game,and the second time was a group of 8: Kenji,Louis,Jo,Amelia,Chao Yang,two other guys and me. This walk was much much longer and of course,much more creepy than the first. Thanks to Amelia for holding my hand throughout(hey,I know sound very "hum-chi",but I was really freaked lah...) and to Chao Yang and the other guy for always walking behind us to ensure we won't end up being at the back! Kenji and Louis both saw something at this building,at the same time at the same place,and thank goodness curiosity didn't get the better of us that night!
We got to the mortuary after much searching,but unfortunately(or fortunately?) it was completely sealed,as in,the doorways and everything were not just locked,they were sealed with cement! There must be a reason why...*shudders* We tried to peep in through the broken windows,but there was nothing much inside,just white-washed walls that looked pretty new,hmmm...We also went into this operating theatre(judging from the designs of the ceiling lights) and right in this last adjoining room,there was this lone chair in the middle,smashed and broken. Yeah,just a damaged chair by itself in the middle of this large empty room. That was when we decided to turn back,all wondering what could have happened before...
Jo was really brave,as in she was so solid! There was this idiot group of other thrill-seeking youths who were behind us in the walk,and then they just screamed and ran away,hoping to scare us. I mean,they were all guys and in their early 20s! It was so stupid to see them doing something sooo pathetic,and Jo was like,"CMI lah please!" HAHA,you rock girl!
We went back at 2.15 and Megan,Siew Min and I then shared a cab(ignoring the extra surcharge and the hole it burnt in our pockets)-we were that exhuasted. We went back on the second night for the main event-the barbecue-which was also really fun,and there was more mingling with the almost-always absent throwers,finally. More games played,more bonding,more eating...and finally it was time to go home!
Exhausting but one of the best chalets I have ever attended! *smiles* Big thanks to James the organiser,Hua Jia,Yao Peng,Shaun and the entire Track and Field team. You guys rock!
Sunday, June 10, 2007
Courage,people!
It's okay to face a challenge,
All you need is to be brave.
I know it's hard to accomplish,
Don't you fret and don't you crave.
Hmmm... I wonder what will help you,
Courage, is that what you need?
Well, of course it is!
Remember, You need courage to succeed.
Don't forget to be courageous,
That is all you need to hear.
Take a deep breath and step forward,
Now it's time to face your fear.
Well, you see?
You were fantastic!
Courage helped you have your say.
And for those who don't like courage:
It will help improve your day!
Yeah,courage is really what matters to pull you through the darkest days people! All the way!
Track chalet tomorrow,which is planned by the trackers for the trackers...and well,yeah the crossers,though we will seem kinda "extra" there. It's just the five of us! Thank you for the invitation guys,but I hope we won't seem to out-of-place there...argh. If only crossers and trackers can train together for the Track Nats to build bonds,which are definitely crucial in contributing to team spirit and of course,teamwork. Ah well,just shut up,stop whining and go for the chalet,girl. It may be better than what you expected...
Ps. I wanna watch Ocean's Thirteen! *whiny voice,hints to Sarah Tan* hahax are you game,gal? :)
All you need is to be brave.
I know it's hard to accomplish,
Don't you fret and don't you crave.
Hmmm... I wonder what will help you,
Courage, is that what you need?
Well, of course it is!
Remember, You need courage to succeed.
Don't forget to be courageous,
That is all you need to hear.
Take a deep breath and step forward,
Now it's time to face your fear.
Well, you see?
You were fantastic!
Courage helped you have your say.
And for those who don't like courage:
It will help improve your day!
Yeah,courage is really what matters to pull you through the darkest days people! All the way!
Track chalet tomorrow,which is planned by the trackers for the trackers...and well,yeah the crossers,though we will seem kinda "extra" there. It's just the five of us! Thank you for the invitation guys,but I hope we won't seem to out-of-place there...argh. If only crossers and trackers can train together for the Track Nats to build bonds,which are definitely crucial in contributing to team spirit and of course,teamwork. Ah well,just shut up,stop whining and go for the chalet,girl. It may be better than what you expected...
Ps. I wanna watch Ocean's Thirteen! *whiny voice,hints to Sarah Tan* hahax are you game,gal? :)
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