I have decided to restart my blogging life. After a long absence from the blogosphere, I return to find more inspiration in posting my thoughts and my daily doses online. Not for the purpose of letting people read, but for the rejuvenative purpose of unleashing a huge bottle of locked emotions. Maybe it is the idea of venting it out on a lifeless, unanswerable computer that really sets me ticking, or maybe it could be that there are no other avenues of release.
The consumptive, overwhelming hand of emotion reaches out and grabs me by the throat, forcefully letting the pain sear throughout the entire body and mind. Sometimes the paralysing surge of emotions is much faster and more potent than most psychologists can ever diagnose. Imagine surging deeply into a dwelth of darkness so bleak that no light can ever penetrate through, leaving one panting and grasping on to the last shreads of happiness. Imagine being suffocated daily by your own thoughts that hold illimitable dominion over everything, even external circumstances. Imagine having to dream and wish, yearn and fight, struggle and grasp, yet all you achieve is but trailing shreds of hope, bearing the tendencies of slipping out of your fingers so easily...
Spiralling deep down down down into the chasm of hopelessness destroys even the strongest man. Desire and knowing THE desire is what keeps people alive. Yet when the flaming torch of passion gets fizzled out slowly, day by day, one starts wondering if there is really a realistic, achievable hold to the once burning want. Fight on, or kill the dream? I stand clueless beyond the looming cloud of dilema, as the unfavourable circumsances close in.
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